you're not serious...

nobody takes me seriously
because its just a threat
because i could never
i would never
but i definitely could and would
not to mention should
but it doesn't often make sense
how it became a joke
my demeanor always serious
and yet my threats idle
i'm just stalling
never fixing anything
i'm such a coward
the scars are just cries for attention
stop being so emo
stop being so fake
you don't have it so bad
but no one sees me at night
when i can't sleep
and my body aches
my fists clench
my heart races and pounds
tears streaming down my face
i can no longer think
but all people see is the smile
the one i wear outside
its not safe to be broken
pieces get lost along the way
not to alarm you but your soul is showing
your humanity growing
and your heart is on your sleeve
i'm nothing but a shell
a hermit for love
wandering and searching
digging deeper and deeper
but the greatest treasure is never found
i don't deserve it
a monster through and through.